Monday, November 16, 2009

Family portrait

The key to attracting people, either romantically or platonically, is confidence.  Making friends is, more often than not, easy for me because I have confidence in my ability to hold a conversation.  I'm intellectually curious, high energy, and pretty open-minded.  It's not particularly necessary to be confident in your physical beauty when attracting friends.  At least not the friends I want to attract. 

It is, however, necessary to have a certain amount of confidence in your physical beauty when seeking a relationship.  

I look like my parents. 

I hate them for what they've done to me and put me through.  It's difficult and damn near impossible for me to see beauty in myself when they are all I see when I look in the mirror.  I want to scratch out my eyes, claw at my cheeks, and cover my forehead in glass.  I can't seem to get over seeing such wretched people daily.  They hurt me and to resemble that is torture.  I've dealt with the emotional pain.  But, how do I forgive them to the degree that I can find my own image attractive?  Is that possible?

How can I be confident while portraying the face of the two nastiest people I've ever known?

I guess I'll just have to feign confidence till then.

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